How To Trap a Troll
by Never-chan
Summary: Harry/Ron: In the dead of night, somewhere in the forbidden forest, two boys set on a task that only a dead man would embark upon. Trapping Trolls. slash


How to trap a troll

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters.

* * *

'Harry this is never going to work!' the exasperated voice of one, Ronald Weasley – Harry Potter's best friend, called out from behind the bushes.

In the middle of the clearing somewhere within the forbidden forest, Harry was busying himself with setting a trap for a troll.

Why you ask? (After all trolls are beastly creatures, one wouldn't want to find themselves willingly in their company. At least not without a death wish and a breath mint as a peace offering.)

Well because, Professor Snape of Hogwarts school of witch craft and wizardry, who happened to be the potions teacher there, had set the assignment that they needed the mucus of a troll. And as both boys had left their schoolwork to the last minute, as per usual – there hadn't been anytime to owl one of the stores in Diagon alley for some.

Well why not ask their other friends for some? Well it was a good thought, in theory anyhow. But as trolls are of the nasty sort, you don't find many sane witches or wizards who would seek one out for collection of said ingredients. Stores were already few as it was, so there wasn't much to pass around.

Which left the two Gryffindors in quite a predicament; especially with Hermione – their other best friend, breathing down their necks combined with Snape's unpleasant nature. Failure to complete the assigned project wouldn't turn over to well.

So here they were. The middle of the night, the day before their homework was due – under Harry's invisibility cloak, both boys had snuck out of the dormitory towards the forest. Because everyone at Hogwarts knows that the forest is filled with all sorts of terrifying beats, and a troll just so happens to fit into that category.

At the time they thought they were brilliant. But as Ron watched Harry Potter, the boy who lived prance around in the grass laying sticks and dropping pebbles, be was beginning to doubt his own intelligence.

'Come on Harry let's just go back,' urged Ron in a harried whisper. They were after all in the forbidden forest, which sent chills down his spine by the mere name. The fact it was the day before the full moon didn't help ease his paranoia.

'And fail Snape's class – are you mad Ron? He'll put us in detention until we graduate!' snapped Harry, rolling his eyes at the mere thought of giving up.

Annoyed, Ron scrambled out of the bushes. Coming to stand beside the dark haired boy instead; his gaze taking in the intricate circle Harry had laid out before them.

'And how is this supposed to help?'

Flustered, Harry looked at his own handiwork with a shrug. 'I don't exactly know... I just asked Luna, seeing she knows all about mystical creatures and she told me to make a circle made of sticks and stones, and to dance in it...'

'You asked loony Lovegood for help!' drawled Ron, his expression blank. Harry flushed looking away.

'Well I didn't see you coming up with anything!'

With a grunt, Ron turned on his heel ready to pack up and head back to the castle. He couldn't believe that Harry had dragged him all the way out to god knows where in the middle of the night based on facts Luna had given them. Though a dear friend, the blonde witch was known as the resident loon of the castle. It wasn't hard to doubt her creditability, save for Harry. The loveable fool.

'No wait – Ron please don't go!'

'Forget it Harry, this was ridiculous! Blimey, I can't believe I'm saying this – but we should have listened to-'

Whatever his present thought was, though Harry had a very good idea, it was never expressed into words. As at the precise moment, an eerie howl echoed through the surrounding area. Both boys froze.

'Was that?'

'A werewolf,' answered Harry drawing his wand, as Ron took a step back to stand by his friend, own wand out and ready.

'I knew this was a bad idea from the start,' grumbled the red head, ignoring Harry's glare.

'Oh posh, you were as much into it as I was.'

'Yeah, well that was before I found out Loony Lovegood was the brains of the operation!'

'Stop it Ron! Luna's our friend, and she tried her best to help! In fact the circle is supposed to be a protective circle from the troll! The dancing is really what attracts it!'

'Last I heard, trolls weren't ones to attend fancy dinner parties Harry! What good will dancing for it do?'

'Well I –'

There, the boy who had lived was stumped.

Given their current situation, Ron wasn't as pleased as he normally would have been with that piece of news.

In the distant they could hear loud thumps, in the quiet of the woodland, it echoed like thunder in a storm. It sent chills down both boy's spines.

'Bugger,' was Harry's grim retort as both he and Ron took an unconscious step towards another.

'This is all your fault you know. I hope you're happy when were both well and dead,' panic clung to his words as Ron spoke with a shaky voice. This was not his ideal way to spend the evening.

'Oh come off it. It's probably just Gwamp out for a nighttime stroll.'

Ron paled, after all Gwamp wasn't that cautious of his own strength. On more than one occasion he nearly swiped off Ron's head while trying to give a handshake.

'Okay maybe that wasn't the best example...'

Was it just them, or was the disturbances coming louder?

'It's getting closer!' squeaked Ron, making a very good impression of a mouse.

The trees shook as the thuds made contact with the forest floor, which hadn't happened before. Indeed Ron's claim rang with some truth.

Beside him the dark haired boy was rubbing his chin in thought. Determination radiating from his emerald orbs. A plan formulating at the very moment.

'Harry!'

'Quiet Ron, I'm thinking!'

'No Harry really!' urged Ron, tugging on his mate's sleeve. Rolling his eyes, the boy who lived turned towards his friend.

'What?'

'Well I –'

'Get on with it!'

'I am! It's just – this is the forbidden forest and it isn't likely will make it out of this alive and -'

Harry rolled his eyes. 'We aren't going to die Ron!'

'Yes we are!' shrilled Ron, both his hands had grabbed the front of Harry's robes, as he held tightly onto him like a life line. 'That's why, well I don't want to have any regrets before the end c-comes and...'

Harry Potter had been too busy counting the freckles on Ronald's face to notice it coming. (He tended to count the freckles, when he was bored. And listening to Ron's idle chatter on death, was boring him immensely.) However, as he counted the twenty-third since the argument started, he suddenly lost count.

Because before the twenty-fourth could be sought and processed, Harry found Ron's mouth on his own. His eyes went wide, so wide he was able to see all of Ron's face, above his nose that is, as well as the background.

Unlike himself, Ron had screwed his eyes together as tightly as possible. Seeing it wasn't that common to kiss a boy, much less your best friend, and he feared that outcome of being rejected.

So obviously Ron hadn't seen Harry's featured softened, which his mouth – drawn into a tight line, had relaxed enough for Ron to feel the softness of the other's lips. Nor had be probably seen that the leaves by the very bushes he once stood by, were rustling more than a breeze could empower.

Sadly neither did Harry. For the moment he let himself go, giving into Ron's demands of last wishes, his own eyes closed as well. Relishing the moment. His hands, at their own accord sought a way around his friend's slender waist – resting there in a award comfort.

And Ron, he did not see any of these things, but rather felt them. The pleasure of acceptance coursing through his veins. Fear forgotten, he concentrated on the task of hand. Snogging the hell out of Harry Potter. He was pleased once again, when the said boy put up little to no resistance.

If he were to die, Ron would die a very satisfied man.

Embracing, both boys were too lost in the battle of tongues to notice that as they were before, they were no longer alone. Yes, that's right - company was amongst them, and it wasn't of the pleasant crowd.

There at the end of the clearing, nearly 10 ft tall was the ominous presence of a disgusting troll. Acidic droll rolled from its tongue, which was lazily hanging from the corner of its open mouth. The green land below the troll, shriveled up and died as soon as the salvia made contact. And with every shuddering breath, a cloud of stink crawled from its being, stripping the trees of the oxygen they produced. And as it was tall, it was also fat. So fat, that his appetite was nearly as enormous as it was. Now that is a lot of food, so much so that there could never really be that much food in the world to feed all the trolls in existence. So more than often, many of them starved. So the sight of the two boys snogging in the clearing, was more than an invitation to the salivating troll.

It was a sad day for mankind, when two youths were too wrapped in their own business, or rather each other to notice the dangers about to befall them. As the troll, simply plucked a rotting tree from the ground like it were a twig and swung it dangerously as if it were a bat of steel. Nearing its prey with a vicious snarl.

It was certain that death was upon them. Death it seemed, in a moment like this, was something foreign and forgotten to the boys. Who were much more knowledgeable at the moment about what happened when one was touched there. Or the noise they made with the other licked here. Both failing to take notice of the ten foot troll towering above. However that is not how the story goes, ending with blood spilt and our main characters in the pit of some hungry trolls belly.

For as soon as the troll brought it's weapon crashing down with an incredible force, it did not make contract with flesh, but rather with magic.

The circle made of nothing more than sticks and stones, indeed had acted as a barrier, just as Luna had told Harry. And now, against the strength of a grown troll it protected it's maker with surprising efficiency.

And like any other who undergoes a great shock, the two wizards sprung apart as if on fire. Only too take one look at the troll, and jump right back into another's arms.

'Harry!'

'Blimey, it actually worked! But we weren't dancing – well not in that sense I suppose' mumbled the dark haired boy, as the memory of their battling tongue for dominance came to mind. I suppose that had been like a dance in a way.

'HARRY!'

'Eh sorry – well now it's here... I guess there's no gain from throwing this opportunity away, I suppose.' Ron stared at the boy like he had grown a second head. 'Well get the sample jar already!'

'You're serious?'

'Ron! Just get the jar!' snapped Harry readying his wand. Seeing little room for argument, the other boy did as told, however reluctant he might have been.

'Just great, of all the other blokes to go around snogging and I had to go and fall for the toss-pot of the bunch. Just great.' Grumbling, Ron aided by being the pessimist, while watching Harry endanger himself with baited breath. He would have helped really, but by the time he had set up everything, Harry had already leapt out of the barrier and was shooting off whatever spell came to the top of his head. There was quite a few.

Eventually, a powerful stunner followed by a jinx just as nasty as the troll, caused the overgrown beast to drop to the forest floor like a fly. A fly that could cause tremors throughout the area by sheer contact.

Hesitantly, Ron set to do his part and approached the ghastly thing with gloves, and a vile as his weapon. That stunner must have been a good one, as the troll didn't even flinch when Ron stuck his hand up its nostril, and wiggled his fingers about.

'That's positively disgusting,' griped Harry coming to stand beside the red head. He hardly had broken a sweat, and thus looked as fresh as a daisy. Ron on the other hand, covered in troll up to his elbows, wasn't fairing as well. If he could, Ron would have kissed the boy. However he could not, so settled for good fashioned words.

'Shuddup.'

How does one trap a troll exactly? Well that can be done in many ways, neither Ron Weasley nor Harry Potter could explain it to you exactly how they had done it. But they - despite Snape's efforts, did manage to get a A on their assignment. And for all the trouble they had gone through, it seemed quite worth it.

Fin.


End file.
